Malik Riaz lauded for ordering NCA to send money to Pakistan

Demonstrating his true Pakistani side, property tycoon, alias Malik Riaz, has forced UK National Crime Agency to hand over the keys to his £50 million London mansion to the Pakistani government, Pakistani media reported on Thursday. He also ordered the NCA to call the matter a civil suit, if not donation, and also ordered the NCA to relinquish the vast sum in cash and assets to Pakistan.

“We appreciated property tycoon, alias Malik Riaz, for surrendering family’s crown jewel in the capital One Hyde Park Place – a £50 million, 16,000 sq ft, Grade II listed mansion overlooking central London’s famous park, to the cash strapped government,” 20 TV anchors in their prime time talk shows at a time on Thursday night.

Welcoming the move, Prime Minister’s Dream Partner in Repatriation of Looted Money Shahzad Akbar said the government would reluctantly welcome the return of ‘hard-earned’ money of the property tycoon, alias Malik Riaz, to Pakistan, and it showed his true love for the Pakistani land. 

Our sources, however, said the property tycoon, alias Malik Riaz, wanted to develop Baharia Town, London phase, which was foiled by the NCA after he refused to gift a plot to the NAC chief. 

The NCA chief did not refute the allegation because we never contacted them. Their response will be published after seeking permission from the publisher and editor, both residents of Baharia Town. 

Disclaimer: This is a serious work (called satire) on not-so-much serious stuff. If you laugh or chuckle while reading this piece, Surkhiyan will not be responsible.