Disclaimer: This is a serious work (called satire) on not-so-much serious stuff. If you laugh or chuckle while reading this piece, Surkhiyan will not be responsible.
A middle-aged man, who was video-taped glancing inside a Marks & Spencer (M&S) store in London, has been identified as a former chief minister of the Punjab province in Pakistan.
The man, said to be in his late ‘50s, was recorded as he peeked in through the front gate of the store in the British capital on Monday morning. He was later identified as Shahbaz Sharif, brother of former Pakistani premier Nawaz Sharif and former chief administrator of the Punjab province.
He had to leave in disappointment as the doors remained shut. Mobile footage showed a visibly ecstatic Sharif waving towards the camera as he departed for another destination.
The store management, however, said they had intentionally kept the doors shut after a twitter user convinced them the man outside the doors was ‘not their first customer of the day’.
“We accord warm welcome to our first customers. It’s a practice we’ve been following since day one. However, before we could get the doors, a social media user alerted us that the person outside the door was a conman,” said Catherine, one of the store’s employees.
“We immediately stopped in our steps. Our cameras even recorded him giving furtive looks. Perhaps, he was looking for some stuff. The management is looking into it,” she added.
Meanwhile, Pakistani authorities denounced the incident as “another attempt at looting the international economy”. Information Minister Firdous Ashiq Awan said that the former chief minister had focused his energies towards hijacking foreign companies.
“Even after choking the economy for a well over 30 years, it seems that the PML-N has not been able to satiate their hunger. Now the party’s president is going after an international brand. Such attempts are a threat to our country’s integrity and won’t be tolerated,” she added.