Suri asks dictionaries to omit word ‘selected’ for five years

Deputy Speaker of the National Assembly Qasim Suri has written dictionaries the world over to omit the word ‘selected’ for at least five years so that a selected part of the world forget the trauma stemming from the ‘selected’ word.

“I urge the dictionaries published to please delete or expunge the word which I’ve banned on the floor of the house in the best interest of Pakistan,” he wrote in his letter to a selected group of publishers on Monday.

“The word, which means adopted or chosen or picked, for ban gives goosebumps to our elected prime minister,” the letter goes on.

“Believe me, he is our elected prime minister. He was never selected by anyone for any selected job. He is the most handsome prime minister on the earth. But the opposition calls him a prime minister-select or a selected prime minister, which is not true.”

Imran Khan’s selection for the top post was done by his party – Pakistan Tehreek-i-Insaf. The party was elected (contrary to opposition’s claims that he was selected) to rule the country in the 2018 general elections.

Prior to the election, NAB singled some PPP and PML-N leaders out for accountability. This endless drama of selection or election has been on since then.

Disclaimer: This is a serious work (called satire) on not-so-much serious stuff. If you laugh or chuckle while reading this piece, Surkhiyan will not be responsible.